Labour makes us healthy, wealthy and wise.

There’s an old saying, ‘Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.’ Well, as I scanned good news story after good news in this morning’s papers it seemed that New Labour is the 21st Century’s method for making us ‘healthy, wealthy and wise’. On health there was Gordon Brown’s ground-breaking plans for nationwide screening. How clever an idea is that! If we don’t get sick then there’ll be no time off work (and the subsequent burden on employers) and no using valuable Government resources on expensive hospital treatments. On wealth Gordon has said he wants three-year pay deals for public-sector workers; this will keep the national finances in good order and protect us all from the evils of inflation. And on wisdom… Well, at first I couldn’t see any obvious candidate, but then I noticed this story about donations to Peter Hain. The allegation is just a piece of silliness, of course, and will soon blow over. However, it does serve to remind us of the time when British politics was genuinely corrupt – namely under the Tories. The Hain story is a salutary reminder that whatever childish gripes we may have against the current Government we’d be very wise to remember what the alternative will be like. Health, wealth and wisdom – New Labour provides them all!